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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27738967">Pickle Baku</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeepRat27/pseuds/DeepRat27'>DeepRat27</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Discord Murder Party (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:08:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>666</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27738967</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeepRat27/pseuds/DeepRat27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>While I prepare my Great Work of the greatest Rick and Morty fanfiction to ever be written (I should know, I have read all of them) I thought I might share my recent humorous escapade with a colleague of mine. I assure you, it is most definitely the funniest shit you have ever seen.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Pickle Baku</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Revealer entered their fellow Black Star’s laboratory due to being summoned there at a prior point. They looked around, the laboratory seemingly empty. However, it was not, in fact empty. Little did they know (for, being the mind, knowing is my speciality) but I was in fact lying in wait on my desk, in a significantly more inconspicuous and humorous form. </p>
<p>“Ælethias,” I called out.</p>
<p>They turned to face the origin of the audio, however they found nothing, having been thoroughly tricked by the Great Mind.</p>
<p>“Baku?” they responded, unknowing of the humour that was to come. “Where are you?”</p>
<p>I chuckled at this, aware of how little they knew. No doubt they would soon feel a sense of great joy and amazement at my extraordinary exploit.</p>
<p>“I am on the desk, Ælethias,” I responded intelligently.</p>
<p>They turned. “All I see is a pickle.”</p>
<p>“Ah, but, turn the pickle over!” I replied giddily.</p>
<p>They turned the pickle over.</p>
<p>They stared.</p>
<p>My singular eye, attached to the pickle stared back.</p>
<p>Ælethias kept staring.</p>
<p>“I call it: ‘Pickle Baku’,” I announced triumphantly.</p>
<p>“Why have you done this?” they asked, though more as a statement than a question. “Why have you turned yourself into a vegetable?” </p>
<p>“Actually, pickles are not vegetables, nor are they fruits, though I would not expect one as uneducated as yourself to understand that. Though of course you can pickle many different fruit and vegetables, the pickled cucumber specifically is a pickled version of the fruit of the cucumber plant and-“</p>
<p>“Baku,” Ælethias said. “Why.”</p>
<p>I opened my mouth to respond, yet they held up a hand, ceasing my attempts at communication.</p>
<p>“No, I know what this is,” they said. “This is another of those things from your ridiculous show, isn’t it."</p>
<p>“You know, Ælethias, the traditional phonology of linguistics requires a rising intonation to be applied to one’s voice when posing an interrogative,” I responded, displaying my immense intellect.</p>
<p>“But, in this case, you have correctly deduced my rationale,” I said. “It is indeed a clever reference to the brilliant human television programme known as Rick and Morty.”</p>
<p>They sighed, muttering to themself, “And I thought Fate's anime was bad."</p>
<p>I began cackling in response.</p>
<p>“I should have known you would have responded that way, Ælethias. I regret that you do not have the intellectual capacity to appreciate Dan Harmon’s genius wit, but I 
suppose that we cannot all be geniuses, can we, hm?” I said.</p>
<p>Ælethias sighed again and turned around. “Do you know how to change yourself back, Baku?”</p>
<p>“I- Well of course I do. I would not perform an experiment such as this without being sure I can reverse it,” I said, smartly keeping my cool and not allowing them to see into my thoughts.</p>
<p>“Right.” They stared at me. “Well, I’m not helping you turn back.”</p>
<p>They began to walk out of the laboratory. I, in a moment that was assuredly not out of panic, quickly mentally blocked the doorway using my extra hands.</p>
<p>The Revealer turned to face me. “You do know that we don’t actually need to use the doors, right? I can still leave.”</p>
<p>“Well, of course, but- I um- er- I have a question for you.”</p>
<p>The eyes on their chest closed in what was surely joy and not exasperation, as Ælethias loves to spend time with me.</p>
<p>“Fine.”</p>
<p>I cleared my throat. “Ælethias, would you or would you not describe this experience as ‘the funniest shit you have ever seen.’”</p>
<p>They stared at me, then turning to leave said, “Goodbye, Baku.”</p>
<p>“Wait-!” I protested coolly, but they had already left.</p>
<p>It was fine. They had probably left to get me help. Or not. Since I, as the Great Mind, do not require any assistance in any task. And I soon turned myself back with absolutely no effort required. There was no help from Cernos. I did not have to ask Cernos for help. I do not know why you would even bring that up.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Did you find that my prose was sufficiently amusing? On a scale from 1-10, 1 being "wubba lubba dub dub", and 10 being "the funniest shit I've ever seen" how would you rate my work of fiction? Please leave "Kudos" and subscribe for more high-brow humour.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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